I haven’t always been patient when it comes to parent drama. I saw a post last week from a gym owner who was frustrated about a parent who she felt was overstepping. The parent was making proposed modifications to the uniform, and instead of directly going to the owner with the proposal, the parent took to Band to get the other parents’ feedback.
As you might imagine, I commented something along the lines of how that owner should really have an open mind about what the parents want. After all, they’re the clients.
The replies to my comment range from a simple, “Nope” to the “annoying” emoji (that’s fair – it’s in my top 5 favorite emojis). It wasn’t until I was talking to Dan Cotton later that day that I realized, I haven’t always been like this. In fact, I was a completely different person the first couple years we owned the gym.
Dan mentioned in his early years he would have said some rude things about this parent to his wife and then calmed down to let the parent know she had overstepped. I’m not sure I was even that kind my first few years.
There were moments I felt my blood boiling and couldn’t resist a snappy comment to a parent who overstepped. Then something happened. My own child got to the age where she was in other activities outside the gym. She spent a season attempting softball (the only time she hit the ball was when the coach pitched it, and it bounced off her bat…) She did Girl Scouts and Sunday School. She even did a year of competitive swim alongside her cheer season.
I would experience my own moments of overstepping. When I had to jump through hoops to figure out how much swim cost, you know I mentioned to the coach how an effective website would make a world of difference. Then, when I had to re-enroll her every few months even though we had committed to the season, you know I told the coach that an automatic re-enrollment would be ideal. In Girl Scouts, when the troop leader tried to please all the parents by first finding out if they were allllllll available before setting the date for an activity, I told her she should create a calendar months out with a Save the Date – and she could always add the activity itself just a couple weeks out – knowing everyone had planned ahead for it.
I was an overstepper. But I never did it with bad intentions. I always did it because I wanted to help.
Your parents are doing the same. Well, 99 percent of them anyway. They know you’re busy. They probably know if organization, planning or communication is your weakness and they’re trying to help. They want this to be the best possible experience for their child and other children around them. You know what’s interesting though? They chose YOUR GYM as the place to get that experience.
So when they have a suggestion that makes you want to roll your eyes, go ahead. In private, do what you need to do. But then take a moment to think about their intentions. Think about their idea. Some of them are amazing ideas with a poor delivery. Get over the “delivery” and really think through the idea. You don’t have to take all of them, but you definitely should consider all of them.
If you’re someone who just can’t stand the parents telling you how to run your gym…go put your child in an activity right now. Seriously. Leave this blog and head over to register your kid for swim, softball or soccer. Sit in those practices and games and experience it as a parent and experience the feelings of “wanting to help” your parents experience every day. It’s pretty eye opening.
